To protect the Bog of Eternal Stench was Sir Didymus’ sacred duty, and to keep the Bog beautiful was his honor and joy.

Didymus petitioned the Palace to plant new flowers, to maintain a garden that would enhance the beauty of the most feared and lonely patch of land in the whole Labyrinth. Planting or sowing anything anywhere in the Labyrinth needed the approval of His Royal Dread Highness, His Regal Magnificence, the Supreme Sorcerer, the King of Goblins—Jareth, for short. Any attempts at horticulture needed to be tightly scrutinized, or else suffer a repeat of the Tumbling Whiplash Thorn-Troll Crisis, which injured dozens of goblins, choked out the gnome population and left the Goblin King with some nasty scars hidden beneath his skin-tight pants (those scars, should anyone see the King’s bare calves, would resemble the thorn tattoos that young men found fashionable in the last decade of the twentieth century.)

Few living things could stand to live in the noxious air of the Bog, as Didymus would come to learn over his long tenure as the Bog’s guardian. Roses were far too fragile and wilted at the first methane “burp.” Daisies fared no better, nor lilies, orchids or sunflowers. Every flower that Didymus imported shriveled at the slightest “TOOT” and “BRRRMPMPMP!” It seemed more and more like an impossible undertaking, a fool’s folly, to expect anything to thrive in the Bog, but impossible fool’s folly undertakings were Didymus’ specialty!

One day, Didymus discovered, hidden amongst the weeds, a patch of Sechs Violets. Delighted at his discovery, Didymus carefully freed the tiny purple blooms from the weeds, and watered them with his own canteen. Then, he discovered a bush of Red-Eye Ethyls, a flower that smelled similar to old cigarettes butts; Stinky Slippers, orchids that stank of unwashed feet; a Magi’s Magnolia tree in desperate need of fertilizer and pruning. Then, to Didymus’ great astonishment and joy, a ten-foot tall Zombie’s Cocoon, a bloom so overwhelming in stench that it was a blessing that it only opened every thirteen years.

“A most magnificent garden, fit for a king!” Didymus weeded, watered, fed, pruned and replanted all of these unusual flowers, flora tough enough not only to survive in this hostile plot of land, but thrive and grow. The Bog did not need new flowers; the hidden and misunderstood flora of the Bog just needed some love and care and time in the sun!

“Grow strong, my pretties,” Didymus patted the soil with care. “Grow strong and beautiful so that we may make our most generous and glamourous King proud!”

You stole my prompt!!!!

How do you feel about Harry Potter crossovers?

(Title goofily inspired by Bruno Mars's "Grenade." Set some time in the future, with only vague spoilers up to 7.08.)

Danny watched as Grace raced over to the crowd of women that were gathering and waiting for Abby to toss the bouquet. For the first time that day, Danny was a bit apprehensive. He was glad to know that Chin and Abby were happy together, but now he was hoping that Grace wouldn't be the person to catch the bouquet. According to tradition, whoever caught the bouquet would be the next person to get married. Danny had only recently gotten used to the idea of Grace having a boyfriend, and there was no way he was prepared to think about his little girl getting married.

Danny idly took a sip out of his glass of champagne and set it down once Abby was ready to toss her bouquet out to the crowd. He watched the trajectory of the bouquet and relaxed when he saw that it wasn't going to land anywhere near Grace. In fact, it was sailing over all of the women's heads. Apparently, Abby had a ridiculous throwing ability. He idly wondered if she had been a pitcher on the softball team in high school.

Danny's brow furrowed when he realized that the bouquet was flying right towards him. He ducked and closed his eyes to avoid being hit by incoming purple orchids and felt a hand firmly grasping his shoulder.

It took Danny a few seconds to realize that Steve must have returned from the restroom, which he had left for before the bouquet toss. He didn't feel the flowers hitting his face, which meant...

Danny slowly opened his eyes and trailed his gaze upwards to see that Steve was staring with wide eyes at the bouquet he had caught in his right hand.

Danny looked up when he heard a snort and saw Grace covering her mouth and her eyes sparkling with humor. Her shoulders were shaking as she tried to contain her laughter. The rest of the small group of women gathered on the dance floor were staring at Steve and Danny with expressions that ranged from baffled to amused.

Danny looked over at Abby, who was smiling softly at this unexpected turn of events. "Well, I didn't expect that to happen," she remarked.

Kono laughed so hard she snorted. "Yeah, who would have thought Steve would be so eager to get married? Did you see how he dashed over to get the bouquet?" Kono gestured with her arm to show the path Steve had taken from the restroom, which was several feet away from the table where he and Danny had been seated. She started laughing again, and her face turned red. Adam patted her arm as she collapsed against his side in a fit of giggles.

Kono's raucous laughter seemed to snap Steve out of his shocked state. He turned to Kono with an annoyed glare. "It wasn't like that! I was just trying to keep the bouquet from hitting Danny in the face."

Lou, who had been sitting across the table from Danny, chuckled and shook his head. "You were rushing over here like it was a live grenade, man! It was just a few flowers."

Steve didn't respond to that. He scowled down at the table and grumbled something inaudible under his breath.

Danny raised his hand to supportively rub Steve's arm. "Hey, Steve? I believe you, and I appreciate that you saved me from the flying bouquet." He grinned at the end of his comment. The situation was pretty funny.

A small smile appeared on Steve's face. "You're welcome." He sat back down next to Danny and draped his arm over the back of Danny's chair, which didn't escape Danny's notice. He started to feel a little dizzy, and if anyone had asked, Danny would have attributed it to the champagne. But really, it was because Steve's knuckles were lightly brushing against his shoulder.

Chin, who had been standing a couple of feet away from Abby when she tossed the bouquet, hummed thoughtfully and returned to his new wife's side. He clasped her hand and sent a teasing grin in Steve's direction. "I'm not really sure how it works if a man catches the bouquet, Steve, but I guess this means you're getting married next." That thought combined with the arm Steve had casually draped over his shoulders made Danny's stomach feel like it was fluttering with a swarm of butterflies. He was pretty sure his face was just as red as Kono's had been earlier, but for very different reasons.

Edited at 2017-04-24 06:35 pm (UTC)